What's the worst thing about getting bitten by a poisonous spider?

You're probably Australian. EDIT: I mean venomous, not poisonous. I am sorry

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Bite Jokes More Bite Jokes

What happened to the dog that ate nothing but garlic?

His bark was much worse than it's bite!

What happens when a T-Rex bites you?

You get a dino-sore.

Bad Thing Jokes More Bad Thing Jokes

What do you call a microscope that when you look through it you see really bad things?

A horoscope.

What's the worse thing to hear during a prostate exam?

A zip.

Edit Jokes More Edit Jokes

What do you call a smart knife?

Cleaver! EDIT: Also Sharp, knew about this one but I like Cleaver better.

What's the difference between procrastination and laziness?

RemindMe! 2 days to edit this post

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

Why are statistics more believable with a larger sample size?

The Ns justify the means.

What does your mother do for a living?

She sells shesells...I mean...Sea sells sea shells...dammit! She's...a beachside entrepreneur.

Australian Jokes More Australian Jokes

What do you call a blind Australian Crocodile?

Q: What do you call a blind Australian Crocodile? A: Crocodile Dunsee

What do you call a display of Australian patriotism?

Stockholm Syndrome.