What would you guys like to ask an American?

Nevermind they'll just tell you anyway

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American Jokes More American Jokes

How can you tell that the movie Martian is not realistic?

Because Americans use imperial unit system.

Why are there no American flags at the DNC?

Because the delegates were standing on them.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

How do you see lesbian relationships?

I said in HD. They didn't like it...

What does a guitarist say when he gets to his gig?

Would you like fries with that?

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you turn an old dishwasher into a snowblower?

You give her a shovel and tell her to get to work.

When is a dog not a dog?

When it is pure bread. Told to me by a friend.

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What if we gave people enough for three fries?

Guy who invented ketchup packets

What did the guy with 6 children say to the guy with six felonies?

I don't know they were speaking Spanish.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

When asked, 'Are you Twittering?

If I'm looking at my phone I now reply, 'No. I am not Twittering,' in a sort of flat monotone. And tweet.

How many Canadians does it take to change a light bulb?

Just two. One to politely ask and the other to politely help.

Nevermind Jokes More Nevermind Jokes

What happened when the two lovers were watching a scary movie in a year when Valentine's day happened to fall on Friday the 13th?

Oh wait, nevermind. I'm an idiot...*

What's the most annoying thing someone can say?

Nevermind.