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What would you like today?

Me: Make me look attractive. Barber: CAROL! CANCEL ALL MY APPOINTMENTS!

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Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why does an elephant have 4 Feet?

Because it would look ridiculous with 8 inches.

What was that?

4-year-old: Nothing. Me: 4: Me: OK. Parenting is easier than it looks.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

Why do bears hate shoes so much?

They like to run around in their bear feet.

When does Sean Connery like to show up at Wimbeldon?

Tennish.

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

Why didn't you go to school today?

Little Banana: Because I didn't peel well.

What would Elvis Presley be doing if he were alive today?

Scratching at the inside of his coffin.

Cancel Jokes More Cancel Jokes

What's being in love feel like?

You know when someone cancels plans you wanted to cancel anyway Almost as good as that.

What club cancels their meeting everytime?

The vegan club

Barber Jokes More Barber Jokes

What did the barber say to the Potato?

You've got eyes on the back of your head!

What did the customer say to the barber after looking at a facial hair catalog?

I moustache you a question about this style shown here, good sir.

Carol Jokes More Carol Jokes

What do crack addicts sing while caroling?

All I Want for Christmas is my two front teeth!

What would you like today?

Me: Make me look attractive. Barber: CAROL! CANCEL ALL MY APPOINTMENTS!