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Where are you going?

Me: Out. I can't stand being hemmed in by four walls. Wife: How many walls has the pub got Five

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What does the snowman call his wife?

Snowblower

Why couldn't the guy with insomnia have an affair with anyone's wife?

Because he couldn't sleep with anyone.

Wall Jokes More Wall Jokes

How many babies do you need to paint a wall?

It depends how strong you throw them

Why was the wall in a store?

Because it's wal-mart.

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

Why do ballet dancers always stand on their toes?

Could they not hire taller dancers

What did one hotdog stand say to the other hotdog stand?

Eyyyy, Garry, didn't know you turned into a hotdog stand too! Eyyyy!

Hem Jokes More Hem Jokes

Where are you going?

Me: Out. I can't stand being hemmed in by four walls. Wife: How many walls has the pub got Five

What did the tailor say to his customer after shortening the length of his pants?

A-hem!

Pub Jokes More Pub Jokes

What is the difference between a pub and an elephant fart?

One is a bar room, and one is a Barooooooooooooom!

What do you call an aardvark that's been thrown out of a pub?

A barredvark!