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How do you get a kid out from a microwave?

Please answer before my wife gets home!

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What can I get for you?

Me: Steak, please. W: How would you like that cooked M: By anyone other than my wife

Why did Henry VIII have so many wives?

He liked to chop and change!

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What would a midget be jealous of at a little kid?

The kid is over 5 feet tall.

How do they pick kids for the Make-A-Wish Foundation?

Natural selection.

Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

What is the difference between a refrigerator and a one foot tall man painting the side of a house?

On a quantum level, there is no difference.

What is the most beautiful thing in the world?

Is it your right thigh, or your left? Or does the answer lie somewhere in the middle?

Microwave Jokes More Microwave Jokes

What do you call it when the new US president waves his hand?

A microwave.

Why don't you put eggs in a microwave?

Because they eggsplode.