Who are the fastest readers?

9/11 victims. They got through over 40 stories in seconds.

This joke may have profanity.

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What's worse than 9/11?

311 Credit goes to my friend Max.

Why didn't the blond call 911?

She couldn't find the 11 on the dial pad.

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Why do procrastinators live the longest?

Because they die at the last second.

How did the Catholic Priest finish the marathon?

He was second to Nun.

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How do you know when you're turning 40?

When your candy jar is filled with Tums..... My wife just came up with that one... Birthday is next week.. Ugh

How many of the commemorative state quarters have you collected?

I have 40.

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Why were 9/11 victims the fastest readers?

They went through 87 stories in 10 seconds.

Who are the fastest readers on earth?

9/11 victims.... They can clear 10 stories in 5 seconds.

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Why are 9/11 victims the best readers?

They can go through 94 stories in seconds!

Who were the fastest readers in the world?

9/11 victims. Went through 87 stories in 10 seconds flat.