Who slept with my wife?

And in the background someone replied "You ain't got enough bullets."

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Bullet Jokes More Bullet Jokes

What was the last thing that went through the Sandy Hook child's mind?

A bullet. I apologize if that joke was aimed for a younger audience. I love Sandy Hook jokes, they never get old. Just like those children.

What does its job only after its been fired?

A bullet.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What is my relationship?

Alex: No sorry tha- glares at wife I'll take YOU RUINED MY LIFE KAREN for $800 Alex

What did Jared Fogle say when his wife told him she wanted kids?

Me too*

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

How'd you sleep?

Him: *texts* Horrible...I was tossing and turn- Me: *crawls out from under his bed* I KNOW, YOU POOR THING.

What's the best thing about sleeping with twenty two year old's?

There is twenty of them.

Background Jokes More Background Jokes

Who slept with my wife?

And in the background someone replied "You ain't got enough bullets."

How can you tell if it is a Salvador Dali painting?

One of the clouds in the background is blowing another one.

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

How much for 2 children?

She replied, "$9.50." "Awesome!" I said. "Do I get to choose or is it a lucky dip "

When she read the order back to me she said, "So, you have one thick sausage, anything else?

I looked her dead in the eye and replied, "Yes, I also ordered a pizza."