Background Jokes

How can you tell if it is a Salvador Dali painting?

One of the clouds in the background is blowing another one.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Who slept with my wife?

And in the background someone replied "You ain't got enough bullets."

Who was that coughing in the background?

Me: Oh, that was Denise. Dad: Oh, da' niece I thought it was da' nephew. Buh dum tsssssssss

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Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

Why are there no Wal Marts in Iraq, Iran, or Afghanistan?

Because there are already too many targets. (credit: some old veteran bum looking guy sleeping on a bench at the police station I went to today.)

What fun drink can put your kid to sleep?

Bleach

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

When she asks "is that your puppy?

Say "No. That's my dad." Then storm off.

What does A&ampW stand for?

Amburgers &amp Woot Beer! Edit: Thanks to my dad for this one.

Salvador Dali Jokes More Salvador Dali Jokes

How can you tell if it is a Salvador Dali painting?

One of the clouds in the background is blowing another one.

What does Salvador Dali have for breakfast?

Surreal.

Da Jokes More Da Jokes

What's an argument in the Middle East but a compliment in the U.S.A?

You da bomb" "No, you da bomb!"

Who was that coughing in the background?

Me: Oh, that was Denise. Dad: Oh, da' niece I thought it was da' nephew. Buh dum tsssssssss

French Jokes More French Jokes

How do you know if you're in a French Village?

If you see sap buckets on telephone poles.

Why do Jihadist Muslims drink only instant coffee?

Because they completely hate the French press. (Reposted)

Muslim Jokes More Muslim Jokes

Why did the French police arrested the Muslim teenager?

Because he was trying to detonate a Samsung Note 7.

What do you call a muslim crocodile?

An Allahgator!

Explode Jokes More Explode Jokes

What did the french chef say when the cheese factory exploded?

Looks like we have debris all over the place

What do you call an exploding dinosaur?

Dino-mite

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

Who slept with my wife?

And in the background someone replied "You ain't got enough bullets."

When I was a little boy I asked my mum 'how many is a couple?

She replied 'oh, two or three' Now I know why her marriage didn't last long