Where do cows stay when they go on vaca...

What did the Canadian eel say when the bartender asked him if he'd had enough?

No, I think I'd like some more-ay.

What is a blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears?

Trying to hold on to a thought.

Where's the best place to hide an elephant?

Dad: Where is the best place to hide an elephant? Me: I don't know, behind a big rock? Dad: In a tree silly. Me: In a tree? Dad: When's the last time you saw an elephant in a tree?

What do you call a smoothie that came out too thick?

A chunky. Credit to my dad this morning..

Cow Jokes More Cow Jokes

Why didn't the cow go to the barn?

He wasn't in the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood.

Why does a milking stool only have 3 legs?

The cow has the udder.

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

How do the Russian people feel about their government?

They're Putin up with it.

Why did the Golfer feel aladeen about his socks?

He had a hole in one.

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

What do you call a tree that hates this joke?

A face palm.

Why don't they tell jokes in base 8?

Because seven ten eleven!

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What did the necrophile say to his ex-girlfriend?

I only loved you for your body!

What did Humpty Dumpty say to his girlfriend when she said they were breaking up?

Is this some sort of yolk

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

Whose parrot sits on his shoulder shouting "Pieces of four"?

Short John Silver!

What do you call a number that won't sit still?

A roamin' numeral.

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

What does a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac spend most of his time doing?

Staying up all night wondering if there really is a dog.

What do you get if you cross an insomniac, an agnostic, and a dyslexic?

A person who stays up all night wondering if there is a dog.

Vacation Jokes More Vacation Jokes

Where do tv's go on vacation?

To remote Islands

What did the hungry terrorist say when he went on a vacation to Hawaii?

ALOHA SNACKBAR***

Impregnate Jokes More Impregnate Jokes

What did God say to Mary after impregnating her?

Praise the Load

Where do cows stay when they go on vacation?

In a moooo-tel.

Hotel Room Jokes More Hotel Room Jokes

Who is Steve?

Why does he call all the time " "What's this bill for a hotel room "

What's an accountant's idea of trashing his hotel room?

Refusing to fill out the guest comment card.

100 Mile Jokes More 100 Mile Jokes

Where do cows stay when they go on vacation?

In a moooo-tel.