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Impregnate Jokes

What did God say to Mary after impregnating her?

Praise the Load

I Love Pizza & You

I Love Pizza & You

Where do cows stay when they go on vacation?

In a moooo-tel. I just thought of this sitting in my hotel room. Sometimes I feel like i dad joke so hard I impregnate my girlfriend from 100 miles away.

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Cow Jokes More Cow Jokes

What did the farmer say after he fed his cows pot?

The Steaks are high.

What makes the noise of a cow when you turn it upside down?

A cow.

100 Mile Jokes More 100 Mile Jokes

Whats green and goes round and round at 100 miles an hour?

A frog in a blender!

Where do cows stay when they go on vacation?

In a moooo-tel. I just thought of this sitting in my hotel room. Sometimes I feel like i dad joke so hard I impregnate my girlfriend from 100 miles away.

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

What do you call feeling bad about watching lame reality TV shows?

Survivor guilt.

Why did the man with no hands go to the doctor?

Because he didn't feel well.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What should you do when your girlfriend starts smoking??

Slow down and maybe use some lube...

What does the alchemist do to please his girlfriend?

Elixir.

Mary Jokes More Mary Jokes

Where did Mary go when the bombs went off?

Everywhere.

How did Mary fall off the swing?

She had no arms

God Jokes More God Jokes

What do you call the god of cheese?

Cheesus

What's the difference between a surgeon and God?

God knows he's not a surgeon.

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

What's the difference between England and a tea bag?

A tea bag stays in the cup longer!

What does a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac do?

He stays awake all night wondering if there is a dog.

Load Jokes More Load Jokes

What are you supposed to do when someone is having a seizure in the bath?

Throw a load of dirty laundry in.

What's the difference between your mama and a washing machine?

The washing machine doesn't follow me around for a week after I dump a load in it.