Why are we here?

Me: Philosophers still don't know 5: No, why are we HERE Wife: Your dad is lost and won't ask for directions

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving?

I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.

What did the big hairy monster do when he lost a hand?

He went to the second-hand shop.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know that one of them is a Marine?

Don't worry he'll let you know

What's the difference between a public park and a public toilet?

I need to know before my court date on Monday.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

How JokeExplainBot spent his weekend?

Explaining his wife.

What did Jay-Z call his wife-to-be?

Feyonce.

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

Why is Simba an orphan?

Because his dad couldn't Mufasa 'nuff

What is Santa's favorite type of cookie?

Ask your dad.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

Why shouldn't you ask Jon Snow what time it is?

Because his watch has ended.

What do you get when you mix Fascism and Communism?

I don't know, that's why I was asking you.

5 Jokes More 5 Jokes

How many country stars does it take to change a light bulb?

Six-1 to change the bulb and 5 to sing about how much they miss the old one.

When does a Pentagon not have 5 sides?

When it's intersected by a plane

Philosopher Jokes More Philosopher Jokes

What does an insomniac, philosopher, atheist, dyslexic do at night?

Lay awake, contemplating the existence of Dog.

How do philosophers shave off their beards?

Occam's razor

Direction Jokes More Direction Jokes

Why are we here?

Me: Philosophers still don't know 5: No, why are we HERE Wife: Your dad is lost and won't ask for directions

Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years?

Even then men wouldn't ask for directions!