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Why couldn't the man open a fish and herb shop?

Because he didn't have the thyme or the plaice.

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

How many cops does it take to push a man down the stairs?

None, he fell.

How do you know when a woman's about to say something smart?

When she starts her sentence with "A man once told me".

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

Why did the boy close his eyes before opening the refrigerator?

He didn't want to see the salad dressing.

What broke?

Opens door* Just wait until I get out there!! parenting from the bathroom

Thyme Jokes More Thyme Jokes

Why was the cook late to Thanksgiving dinner?

He lost track of thyme. Happy Thanksgiving.

What did the chef say when he ruined the soup with too many herbs?

Well, this was a waste of Thyme.

Plaice Jokes More Plaice Jokes

What do you call a fish that stands out?

Out of plaice.

What's the difference between a flatfish and a good woman?

The fish doesn't know it's plaice.