Why couldn't the man open a fish and herb shop?

Because he didn't have the thyme or the plaice.

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What did the police officer say to the man who was urinating publicly?

Urine trouble, mate!

What do you call a man who thinks women are easy to lie to?

Deceased

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

What time does Sean Connery get to the US Open?

Ten-ish

What did the redditor say when he opened his package from the UniBomber?

Wow, I did not expect this post to blow up

Thyme Jokes More Thyme Jokes

Why couldn't the man open a fish and herb shop?

Because he didn't have the thyme or the plaice.

Why did the guy spend the entire day throwing out his surplus of herbs?

He had too much thyme on his hands.

Plaice Jokes More Plaice Jokes

What do you call a fish that stands out?

Out of plaice.

What did the boy fish say to his girlfriend?

Your plaice or mine'!