Why do men die before their wives?

Because we want to!

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the sailboat start exercising?

It wanted to get into ship-shape. HA!

Why did the book join the police?

He wanted to work undercover.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why did the programmer get a job working with big data when his wife died?

He just needed a little bit of Clojure.

Why didn't you report your stolen credit card?

Man: The thief was spending less than my wife. Police: Then why are you reporting it now Man: I think now the thief's wife has started using it!

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why did the man drink two beers with his lunch?

Because he wanted to drink two beers with his lunch.

Why do little boys whine?

Because they're practicing to be men.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

Why did the two most senior nuns in the convent break up a German terror plot to steal millions in bearer bonds?

Old habits die hard

Which part of your body shuts down last when you die?

The eyes, cause they di-late.