Why do kangaroos hate rainy days?

Because all the kids have to play in side.

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Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie?

It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

What is it called when a woman can't imagine having kids?

Inconceivable.

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

What did the mime say to the wall?

Tough getting by these days.

Why was Jon walking backwards on the first day of school?

Everyone kept saying it was back to school time.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Why can't moccasins play the blues?

They've got no sole.

What do you call Charlie Sheen's brother if he were a financial advisor?

Emilio Investevez. Fun game/running joke friends in college used to play. Wondering if Reddit would enjoy the game too.

Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

Why do writers hate the Bible?

It has terrible characters, Noah is the only one with an arc.

How much would you say you read the Bible?

Well, I don't read it religiously." Bud-dum tss, I hate myself.

Kangaroo Jokes More Kangaroo Jokes

What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!

What do you get if you cross a sheep and a kangaroo?

A wooly jumper!