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Why do old people read the Bible so much?

I asked my grandad the other day "why do old people read the Bible so much?" He replied "cause we're cramming for finals"

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Why do people ask "what the hell were you thinking"?

Obviously, I was thinking I was gonna get away with it and not have to explain it

What does an accountant say when you ask him the time?

It's 9.18 am and 12 seconds no wait - 13 seconds no wait - 14 seconds no wait......

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Who was the best actor in the Bible?

Samson he brought the house down!

Who is the richest person in the Bible?

The Pharao's daughter. She went to the bank of the Nile to pick up a little prophet.

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How do you know when someone's read the Game of Thrones books?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.

Why are Twitter jokes not as funny when you read them aloud to a friend?

It's not like they had to be there...

Old People Jokes More Old People Jokes

What do old people with Alzheimer's often say?

I don't remember.

Why do old people read the Bible so much?

I asked my grandad the other day "why do old people read the Bible so much?" He replied "cause we're cramming for finals"

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What are we waiting for?

The doctor asks. "Patients, Doctor," replied the nurse. "Patients."

How do I do that?

He asked. "Carefully" replied the vet.

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Why do old people read the Bible so much?

I asked my grandad the other day "why do old people read the Bible so much?" He replied "cause we're cramming for finals"

What happens if the protesters in Egypt win?

They advance to the finals against Tunisia.

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Why are there so many old people in Church?

They're cramming for the final.

How do you study for a prostate exam?

By cramming.