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Why do you never buy a woman a watch?

Because there's a clock on the stove.

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Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What's long and hard and makes women groan?

An ironing board.

How many women have you slept with My wife asked me, "How many women have you slept with?

I proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."

Watch Jokes More Watch Jokes

Why did Jon Snow need a new battery?

For the watch.

What kind of TV show do felines watch?

Catoons

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Which phone??

Person 1: Suggest me a good phone to buy nowadays. Person 2: Microsoft Lumia 950 XL is good for winters, will keep you warm. Very warm. Person 1: So what about summers then? Person 2: Same, it freezes often as well

What store does Governor Ratcliffe go to buy his video games?

IT'S BABBAGES, BABBAGES

Clock Jokes More Clock Jokes

What does that clock say at 1 o'clock night?

1 AM feeling very sleepy.

Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?

He wanted to see time fly.

Stove Jokes More Stove Jokes

Why don't you buy your wife a watch?

There's already a clock on the stove

Why are there rugs in front of the stove and the sink?

So women know where to stand in the kitchen.