Why isn't Kanye West allowed in rural Pennsylvania?

An Amish with a tool, you know that's unheard of.

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How do you understand women?

I really just want to know.

How do you know when you are in bed with a witch?

She has a big "W" embroidered on her pyjamas!

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Where are you only allowed to swim if you have red hair, a lip piercing, three brothers, a missing finger, are slightly overweight and have a birthday in December?

The specific ocean.

Why did the vulture fly United Airlines?

Because they allow 1 free carrion

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How did Kanye West ask Kim Kardashian to marry him??

Will i marry you?

How many photos of Kanye West do you suppose Kanye West has on his phone?

More than 1,000

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Why can't Shia Joe travel in eastern Pennsylvania?

Because it's always Sunni in Philadelphia.

Where do pens and pencils go on vacation?

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Why was the Amish girl excommunicated?

Too Mennonite." - Hitchens

How are the Mafia and the Amish similar?

They both don't like wires

Tool Jokes More Tool Jokes

What tool does a black lumberjack use?

An ask. (Explanation: Because most black people say ax for ask, it is swapped around.) Came up with it by myself, how did I do

Why isn't Kanye West allowed in rural Pennsylvania?

An Amish with a tool, you know that's unheard of.