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Achieve Jokes

How do Communists achieve a revolution every single year?

They planet!

We've Got This Love Thing Down
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We've Got This Love Thing Down

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Why couldn't the effective vitamin supplement achieve true happiness?

He was too super fish oil.

Why did the Senator get on Viagara?

He wanted to achieve erection reform.

What's the best part about being cremated?

Finally achieving a smokin' hot body.

What's the difference between Hillary and Eva Braun?

One achieved fame and significance solely because she was married to a charismatic politician. The other was Hilter's wife.

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Reach Jokes More Reach Jokes

Why did the skydiver die before reaching the ground?

Because he reached terminal velocity.

Why did Yoda need a stepladder in the chocolate shop?

Because he was reaching for a galaxy far, far away.

Significance Jokes More Significance Jokes

What's the difference between Hillary and Eva Braun?

One achieved fame and significance solely because she was married to a charismatic politician. The other was Hilter's wife.

How many tax auditors does it take to find a $1.00 mistake in an expense report?

Three. One to find the mistake and two to discuss the significance of it.

Sperm Jokes More Sperm Jokes

What do sperm and politicians have in common?

About 1 in every 500 or 600 million have a chance at becoming human.

Why is a man's pee yellow and his sperm white?

So he can tell if he is coming or going.

Fame Jokes More Fame Jokes

What's the difference between Hillary and Eva Braun?

One achieved fame and significance solely because she was married to a charismatic politician. The other was Hilter's wife.

Cremate Jokes More Cremate Jokes

What did the cremated Buddha who was placed in a cardboard box say?

I'm in light urn.'

Why did the blonde feminist want to be cremated when she died?

She thought a traditional burial would be too bio-degrading.

Stonehenge Jokes More Stonehenge Jokes

Why has Stonehenge been there since 2000 BC?

Because it's stoned.

What kind of music do they play at Stonehenge?

Hard Rock.

Senator Jokes More Senator Jokes

What do you call a snake that works for the government?

Senator.

Why did the Senator get on Viagara?

He wanted to achieve erection reform.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What do you get if you are telling puns while jogging?

A running joke.

How do you know if someone is an Alabama fan?

Oh don't worry, they'll tell you.