Imperial Jokes

What do you call it when Darth Vader moves one foot?

The Imperial March

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How do we know that Darth Vader is American?

Because he marches to the Imperial March and not the Metric March

What is the Rebel Alliance' least favorite month?

The Imperial March.

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What's a Christian's least favorite typeface?

Helvetica, it's the fount of all evil.

What did Dr. Evil say when he fell in the rancor pit?

Throw me a frickin bone here.

Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

What's the difference between "a choice" and " to choose?

A choice" is a decision you make. "To choose" are what Mexicans put on their feet.

Why do we measure snakes in inches?

Because they don't have any feet!

America Jokes More America Jokes

Who does Matthew McConaughey say is the most dangerous group in America?

Alt-right, alt-right, alt-right

Why aren't there any knock knock jokes about America?

Because Freedom Rings.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How does an Apple Watch owner know that it's midday?

It's already run out of battery.

How was I supposed to know I wasn't supposed to cook the macaroni necklace?

Sigh* Parenting is hard.

Martian Jokes More Martian Jokes

Where do Martians drink beer?

At a mars bar!

What is the swamp-dwellers favorite form of extraterrestrial life?

The Martians

Rebel Alliance Jokes More Rebel Alliance Jokes

Why do certain asian boxers hate the Rebel Alliance?

Because they are Thai fighters.

What is the Rebel Alliance' least favorite month?

The Imperial March.

Usa Jokes More Usa Jokes

Who succeeded the first President of the USA?

The second one!

What goes after USA?

USB.

Month Jokes More Month Jokes

How long have I got?

Not long. Two, three months" casually places apple on desk "Ok, ok, six. Just get that out of here!"

What did the doctor say to the cancer patient?

You have tumor months to live.