Rectal Thermometer Jokes

How can you tell the difference between a thermometer and a rectal thermometer?

The taste.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

What's a difference between a oral and a rectal thermometer?

The taste

What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?

The taste

What's the difference between a rectal thermometer and an oral thermometer?

The taste!

What's the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?

The taste.

What is the difference between a rectal thermometer and a regular thermometer?

The taste.

Why does the Philippines ban rectal thermometers?

They cause too much brain damage.

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Why do mice have long tails?

Well they'd look silly with long hair!

Who's a good girl?

WHOSAGOODGIRRRRLLL Me: *looks around* *slowly raises hand*

Cause Jokes More Cause Jokes

Why can't Sally ride the swings?

Cause she doesn't have arms. Knock, Knock, Whose there Not Sally...

Why is a toothbrush a "tooth" brush?

Cause it was invented in Alabama! Inspiration came from the comments(http://mobile.reuters.com/article/idUSKBN0GP1NS20140825 irpc=932)

Temperature Jokes More Temperature Jokes

Why did the nurse always insist on using the rectal thermometer to obtain temperatures?

Because nurses are taught in nursing school to always look for her patient's best side.

What's the temperature in Motown right now?

Three degrees, four tops

Taste Jokes More Taste Jokes

What you call toes that taste like mint?

Tic-tac-toe! My 8 year old daughter made this one up.

What does gasoline taste like?

I don't know, I'm in a coma.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why did the man use a pair of scissors on the rope?

The knife just wasn't cutting it.

Where are the colored printers?

I said "Dude... it's 2014, you can use whichever printer you want"

Philippine Jokes More Philippine Jokes

Why does the Philippines ban rectal thermometers?

They cause too much brain damage.

Why can't the Philippines field an ice hockey team?

The players all drowned in spring training.

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What do you call a puppy in the desert?

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How can you tell if you're in Detroit or across the river in Windsor Ontario Canada?

Stand in the middle of the street. If someone yells, "hey, get out of the street" you're in the US. If they yell, "get out of the street, eh" you're in Canada

Oral Thermometer Jokes More Oral Thermometer Jokes

Whats the difference between a rectal and an oral thermometer?

The taste.

What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?

The taste