Insist Jokes

Why do tailors hate statisticians?

They insist that the fit could be better.

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Why did the melon insist on having a big wedding?

Because it cantaloupe.

Why did Eminem make a terrible barista?

Because he kept insisting everyone only get one shot.

Why do melons insist on having big weddings?

Because they just cantaloupe.

How many bassoonists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one but they'll insist on going through about 5 bulbs before they find one that suits this particular room and situation.

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Nurse Jokes More Nurse Jokes

What is a nurse in the maternity ward's favorite kind of food?

Delivery.

What's the difference between a nurse and a nun?

A nun only serves one God.

Shot Jokes More Shot Jokes

Why did Eminem make a terrible barista?

Because he kept insisting everyone only get one shot.

Why don't anti-vaxxers hang out in bars?

They're afraid of the shots.

Eminem Jokes More Eminem Jokes

Why did Eminem make a terrible barista?

Because he kept insisting everyone only get one shot.

What is Eminem made of?

He is made of Mathers

Rectal Thermometer Jokes More Rectal Thermometer Jokes

What's the difference between a rectal thermometer and an oral thermometer?

The taste!

What's the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?

The taste.

Big Wedding Jokes More Big Wedding Jokes

Why did the melon insist on having a big wedding?

Because it cantaloupe.

Why do melons insist on having big weddings?

Because they just cantaloupe.

Invade Jokes More Invade Jokes

How Many Russians Does It Take To Invade Crimea?

None according to the Russians.

What do you call a group of invading pirates?

An **Arrr**my

Low Case Letter Jokes More Low Case Letter Jokes

Why did the USSR have so many lower case letters?

Because they aren't capitalist

Melon Jokes More Melon Jokes

Why can't the two melons get married?

I don't know but they cantaloupe.

Why would two melons in love hate their parents?

Because they cantaloupe. =D.....=).....=='(