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Ron Weasley Jokes

Why couldn't Ron Weasley make a Horcrux?

Because you need a soul for that.

Birthday State of Mind

Birthday State of Mind

What did Ron Weasley do the first time he saw Hermione naked?

He whipped out his wand and yelled, "***Shtupify***!".

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Whip Jokes More Whip Jokes

Why did Willow Smith whip her hair?

Because it has been very knotty. Apologies in advance

Why do cows think cooks are mean?

They whip cream!

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What's the difference between a virtual car and a real one?

You can't steal a real car a few bits at a time

How can you tell when it's time to go to bed at Michael Jacksons house?

When the big hand touches the little hand

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What would happen if all Chinese people jumped off a chair, all at the same time?

I don't know either, but you would need a reeeally big chair!

Why does Snoop Dawg need an umbrella??

Fo Drizzle.

Hermione Jokes More Hermione Jokes

Why didn't Harry Potter want to date Hermione?

Because he likes to Hit it and Quidditch

What did Harry Potter say when he fell down the hill?

Ouch! I Hermione!

Horcrux Jokes More Horcrux Jokes

Why couldn't Ron Weasley make a Horcrux?

Because you need a soul for that.

What's the difference between Voldemort and Tyrion Lannister?

One had a horcrux, the other had a whorecrush..

Soul Jokes More Soul Jokes

What's the difference between a woman in the bath and a woman at church?

Well... the woman at church has hope in her soul.

What's the difference between a nun in church and a nun in the bath?

One has hope in her soul...