Workout Jokes

What do you call a Norse god after a workout?

Thor

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

What did the velociraptor say after his workout?

I'm a little dino-sore.

What kind of workout does Bob the electrician do?

Circuit training.

Why can't John complete a workout?

He tried, but it didn't work out.

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Cereal Jokes More Cereal Jokes

What cereal was removed from Tim Cook's breakfast?

Apple Jacks

What's my favorite pirate workout and cereal?

Captain Crunch

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

How did the desk lamp store manager feel when thieves stole all his lightbulbs?

He was delighted.

Why did the dolphin feel crabby?

Because he ate too many crabs!

James Bond Jokes More James Bond Jokes

What was James Bond after he slept through an earthquake?

Shaken, not stirred.

Why is James Bond's favourite bartender played by Michael J Fox?

He doesn't need to tell him to shake the martini.

Spoiler Jokes More Spoiler Jokes

Why did everyone turn away when the race car drove past?

It had a SPOILER on it.

What is The Mountain's favorite tri-cep workout?

Spoilers) Skull crushers

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

Why did Mary and Joseph's WIFI get hacked?

Because Jesus WEPt.

What would Jesus say if you angered him?

I'm Crossed.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

How did Jared Fogle lose 40 pounds?

He dumped his girlfriend.

What do locking the keys in your car and getting your girlfriend pregnant have in common?

Both can be solved with a coat hanger

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

How do people with injured hands commute to work?

Carpool tunnels

What's yellow and lies in a pond?

Disclaimer: I don't know how well this joke will work in English. What's yellow and lies in a pond? An excevator. You don't think this is funny? Neither does the operator.

France Jokes More France Jokes

What do they call Independence Day in France?

A Royale-free with cheese! (Happy Bastille Day(https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BastilleDay)!)

What do you get when you throw a grenade into a kitchen in France?

Linoleum blown apart