What signal tells you that a politician is lying?

The lips are moving

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Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

Why did the monster lie on his back?

To trip up low-flying aircraft.

Why were the hens lying on their backs with their legs in the air?

Because eggs were going up!

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What do you tell a woman who wants a larger outlook on life?

Tell her to stand next to the kitchen window

Why is Santa always happy?

Because he knows where the naughty girls live. (a kid told me this one)

Lip Jokes More Lip Jokes

Where are you only allowed to swim if you have red hair, a lip piercing, three brothers, a missing finger, are slightly overweight and have a birthday in December?

The specific ocean.

Why can't you hear a dog whistle?

Because they have a hard time puckering their lips the right way.

Signal Jokes More Signal Jokes

Which among them goes completely ignored?

The turn signals.

What don't BMWs have that all other manufacturers do?

Turn signals

Politician Jokes More Politician Jokes

Why is heaven a paradise for the common man?

Because all the politicians are in hell.

How is a broken clock better than a politician?

The clock is still right twice a day.