How can you tell that a politician lies?

His lips are moving

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Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

Who is the most trustworthy lover?

Shakira. Her hips don't lie.

Why did Dracula lie in the wrong coffin?

He made a grave mistake.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Which burgers can tell your fortune?

Medium burgers!

Why were the 5 gorgeous young blonde Danish fashion models sobbing their eyes out?

I told them I wasn't going to give birth to them.

Lip Jokes More Lip Jokes

Why can't you hear a dog whistle?

Because they have a hard time puckering their lips the right way.

Why does the Avon lady walk funny?

Because her lips stick

Politician Jokes More Politician Jokes

What is the best way to stop a politician?

A really strong gust of wind.

What's the difference between Politicians and Thieves?

Thief: They steal your money then run Politician: They run and then steal your money