How do you get an Aussie to climb up on the roof?

Tell him drinks are on the house.

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What does Bill Cosby do when he can't sleep at night?

He finishes her drink EDIT: Apparently this is Conan's joke, so all credit goes to him. I just heard it from a friend of mine and I had no idea.

Why did the blonde bring a ladder to the party?

I told her that drinks were on the house

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did they tell the most famous child actress from the 30's when she tried to audition for a role in Harry Potter?

Shirley you can't be Sirius.

What did the blonde say when her doctor told her that she was pregnant?

Is it mine"?

House Jokes More House Jokes

Why should you only invite gas molecules to your house when they have negligible intermolecular forces between them?

Because they're the ideal gas.

Why do men buy electric lawn mowers?

A. So they can find their way back to the house.

Roof Jokes More Roof Jokes

How do you reduce wind-drag on a musician's car?

Take the Domino's Pizza sign off the roof

What did the dog say to the fireman?

The roof is on fire.

Climb Jokes More Climb Jokes

What's white and can't climb trees?

A Refrigerator

What's big and hairy and climbs up the Empire State Building in a dress?

Queen Kong.

Aussie Jokes More Aussie Jokes

How do you get an Aussie to climb up on the roof?

Tell him drinks are on the house.

What's the difference between an Aussie and a Yoghurt?

A Yoghurt's got culture!