How does an international banker have a good Friday night?

He goes to a bar and slips somebody a Rupee, then gives them a Franc and some Deutsche Marks.

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Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

What was the Olympic lifter missing from his bar?

Weight for it...

What's the difference between an alcoholic and a necrophiliac?

One goes to the bar for a cold one. The other goes to a morgue.

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What does an insomniac, agnostic, dyslexic spend most of his time doing?

Staying up all night wondering if there really is a dog.

What's worse than stepping on a Lego in the middle of the night?

A landmine.

Friday Jokes More Friday Jokes

Which day do chickens hate the most?

Friday.

Where do graphic designers go for a drink?

CGI Friday's

Somebody Jokes More Somebody Jokes

Why was the lightbulb invented?

Somebody had an idea.

What sound do dogs make?

3-year-old: Woof woof. Me: Horses 3: Neigh. Me: Pigs 3: Sizzle sizzle. Somebody understands bacon.

Slip Jokes More Slip Jokes

How does a bull stay warm on a bitterly cold day?

He goes into the barn and slips into a nice warm Jersey.

What happened when the computer fell on the floor?

It slipped a disk.