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How many doctors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one but he has to have a nurse to tell him which end to screw in.

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Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It's a really obscure number and you've probably never heard of it.

How many children with ADHD does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Wanna go swimming?

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many MRAs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Tires need changing too you know!

How many homophones does it take to change a lightbulb?

Nun.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you tell the difference between a factory worker, and a chemist?

Ask them to pronounce 'unionized'

How do you know if someone owns an Apple Watch?

Don't worry, they will tell you.

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

There's really no sure way to know.

How many Bill Cosbys does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one but every time he does he causes a blackout.

End Jokes More End Jokes

What's the difference between a optimist, a pessimist and a realist?

The optimist sees the light at the end of the tunnel. The pessimist sees nothing. And the realist sees the train.

What starts with an A and has a boom at the end?

Allahu akbar

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

What did the doctor say when he saw two fetuses being too affectionate in public?

Get a womb, you two.

Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

Because he felt crumby. - my 4 y.o. daughter

Nurse Jokes More Nurse Jokes

What did the nurse say to John Cena?

ICU.

Where does it hurt?

Me: *Points to heart* Nurse: Awwww that is so cute! Me. *COLLAPSES FROM HEART ATTACK*