How many racecar drivers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It's impossible, they only know how to turn to the left.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know you're getting old?

When you exit a museum, you trigger the alarm.

When I was kid, and we'd go sledding on a cold snowy day, Ya know how often I had to rub my hands together to stay warm?

Intermittenly.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs laying in a pile of leaves?

Russel.

Why has the ex-NSA contractor not left his house?

He's snowed in.

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many Apple workers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One to over hype the new lightbulb and one to make sure it breaks within a year.

How many NRA spokesmen does it take to change a lightbulb?

More guns!

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three. 1 to screw it in and 2 to talk about how much better Neil Peart could've done it

What did Little Bo Peep say to Woody when she got caught screwing Buzz?

You got a friend in me.

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What did pirate say when he turned 80?

AYE MATEY

Why would anyone want to study the Earth and how it rotates?

I guess that some people just want to see the world turn

Racecar Driver Jokes More Racecar Driver Jokes

Why aren't sumos chummy with racecar drivers?

They move in different circles.

How many racecar drivers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It's impossible, they only know how to turn to the left.