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How much has this man had to drink?

Nurse: "I can't tell." Dr: "It's ok; you can tell me. I'm a doctor"

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

Why does Marx only drink herbal tea?

Because property is theft.

What would happen if you crossed Magilla Gorilla with a Saint Bernard?

It would drink the brandy it would carry and act like a big Gorilla!

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why did the man get a job as a horse handler?

He wanted stable employment

What's the best way to get a man to remember your anniversary?

Get married on his birthday.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you tell a chemist from a non-chemist?

Ask them to pronounce 'unionized.'

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when someone told him to upgrade to Windows 7?

I still love vista, baby

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

What did the doctor say to the Fonz when he got sick?

You need to take your vitamin Ayy.

What do you call a vet that can only work on one animal?

A doctor

Dr. Jokes More Dr. Jokes

Why did Joan Rivers die during throat surgery?

Q: Why did Joan Rivers die during throat surgery? A: Because her career as a comic was stuck, but no matter how he tried, the Dr. Couldn't pull a laugh out of her.

What can you give me to keep it in?

Dr.: a plastic bag