How old do I look?

9yo: 30 Aww, you deserve ice crea- 9yo: Just like grandma -m but too bad you're not getting any

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Look Jokes More Look Jokes

What do a racist and an apple have in common?

They both look good hanging from a tree

How are lawyers and apples similar?

They both look good hanging from a tree

Grandma Jokes More Grandma Jokes

How old is your Grandma?

I dunno but we've had him a long time.

Why'd it take Little Red Riding Hood so long to figure out it wasnt her grandma?

I can tell after like 2 questions if its a wolf or my nana

Deserve Jokes More Deserve Jokes

Why is moving to Canada always plan B?

Canada deserves to be plan eh.

Why do dogs turn around three times before lying down?

One good turn deserves another.

Ice Jokes More Ice Jokes

What did water say when ice farted?

Ice melt it.

What if aliens are responsible for global warming?

And this is just their way of breaking the ice.

30 Jokes More 30 Jokes

What did they tell the most famous child actress from the 30's when she tried to audition for a role in Harry Potter?

Shirley you can't be Sirius.

What did the Irishman text his Wife?

Honey I'm down at the pub having a pint with the lads. Be home in about 30 min. If I'm not back by then please read this message again.