What do a racist and an apple have in common?

They both look good hanging from a tree

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Look Jokes More Look Jokes

What would you like today?

Me: Make me look attractive. Barber: CAROL! CANCEL ALL MY APPOINTMENTS!

Don't look at the eclipse through a colander.

You'll strain your eyes.

Hang Jokes More Hang Jokes

What's your emergency, sir?

Me: I'm being taken away by ducks! I'm being- 911: Please don't do this, sir M: AbDUCKted! 911: *hangs up*

Why didn't they punish the student who hung himself?

He was already suspended.

Apple Jokes More Apple Jokes

Why do feminists hate Apple?

Because they're not PC.

Why do white girls like Apple?

Because once go Mac you never go back.

Tree Jokes More Tree Jokes

What do you get when you watch a lumberjack chop down a tree?

Bored.

How do you improve public transportation in Ferguson, MI?

Move the trees closer together.

Racist Jokes More Racist Jokes

What do you call an Islamic pilot?

A pilot, you racist.

What do you call a black man flying plane?

A pilot you racist.