What did the chicken say to the duck who was about to cross the road?

Don't do it, man, you'll never hear the end of it!

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Chicken Jokes More Chicken Jokes

Who's no chicken?

Donald Duck.

Why did the chicken cross the road with a knife?

Because it saw Lena Dunham on the other side.

Road Jokes More Road Jokes

Why did the accountant cross the road?

Because that's what they did last year.

Why did Jim Morrison cross the road?

To break on through to the other side.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get when you cross a Swedish tennis pro, a computer virus, and an insatiable hunger for mort flesh?

Cyborg Bjorn Borg hosting smorgasbords at the morgue.

Why did Serj Tankian cross the road?

Because he wanted to...

Duck Jokes More Duck Jokes

What kind of drugs do ducks take?

The snort quack.

What did Alyssa the duck say to Henry the beaver?

Quack quack!

End Jokes More End Jokes

How did the mathematician reach the end of the Y-axis?

On a plane.

Why is marriage like thin toilet paper?

Because you end up with a ring on your finger.

Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

What's the funniest joke you've heard that can be told to a 5th grader?

I always loved this one: (works better said out loud of course) What do you call a fish with no eyes... A FSHHH

How do you spot a terrorist?

They'll freak out when they hear a helicopter