What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and your TV is floating?

Man, wall mounts are awesome.

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Float Jokes More Float Jokes

What did the ship captain say when his son learned to float?

That's my buoy!

What happens when you drop a decimal point in water?

It floats.

Middle Jokes More Middle Jokes

What 2 things do Winnie the Pooh and John the Baptist have in common?

They both ate honey and they both have the same middle name.

How can you tell which end of a worm is which?

Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs!

Tv Jokes More Tv Jokes

Why do they keep making TVs thinner and thinner?

To keep up with the content.

Where do tv's go on vacation?

To remote Islands

Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

Why did the emo swallow an alarm clock?

So he could wake up inside.

Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's ok, he woke up.

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What do you get if you cross an agnostic, a dyslexic and an insomniac?

Someone who lays awake at night, wondering if there is a dog.

What does a dyslexic agnostic insomniac do?

Stays up all night pondering the existence of a dog