What happens when almonds die?

Diamond

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Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happened to wendy on her way to neverland?

She peed her pants (read out loud)

How'd you sleep last night?

Son says: "umm... With my eyes closed " Edit: This actually happened btw. Probably funnier irl.

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What did Tupac say when his best friend died?

No Biggie.

What did the boy say when his dog died?

I'm gonna miss you buddy, you were my best friend.

Almond Jokes More Almond Jokes

Why is it called an "almond" in the tree but an "amond" when it falls to the ground?

When it falls to the ground, it knocks the 'ell out of it.

What's the hardest part about being a vegan?

Waking up at 5 am to milk the almonds.

Diamond Jokes More Diamond Jokes

How can Euchre and Marriage be similar?

Sometimes you start out all hearts and diamonds, but end up wishing you had a club and a spade.

What happens when almonds die?

Diamond