What's the difference between a goat and a kid?

My neighbour isn't unknowingly raising two of my goats.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?

I wouldn't pay 50 to have a lentil on my face...

What is the difference between memory and ram?

I can't memory my weiner in your mouth.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What is it that you are both most fearful of?

WIFE: I just...sobbing...don't want the kids to suffer ME: Eels

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eye patch?

Names.

Goat Jokes More Goat Jokes

Why did the goat stop trying to break out of jail?

Because he was just tired of being an escape goat.

How do Muslims do foreplay?

They tickle the goat on the chin.

Raise Jokes More Raise Jokes

Why is the Austrian flag red-white-red'?

So that they can't raise it upside-down

Who made this Christmas pudding?

Our chef. He's a little green man who lives in a toadstool. What did he use to make it Elf-raising flour of course.

Neighbour Jokes More Neighbour Jokes

What do you call the horse than lives next door?

A neighbour!

How does a poor man watch TV?

With binoculars. u know, he has to watch whatever the neighbours are watching.