What's the difference between a good friend and a really good friend?

A good friend will help you move house A really good friend will help you move a body!

Mark Spitz and Greg Swallows Yeah, I know it's old....

What's the difference between a dog and a fox?

About 20 beers!!

What happens when the President dies?

The Vice President takes over. What happens when the Vice President dies? The Speaker of the House takes over. What happens when the Speaker of the House dies? You go to Radio Shack and buy a new speaker.

Who do you call when theres a fly in your house?

The SWAT team

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

What has 4 legs in the morning, 2 legs in the evening and 6 legs at night?

I've trapped it in my bedroom, send help...

What do call an ant that helps you with your taxes?

An account-ant.

Good Friend Jokes More Good Friend Jokes

Why can't Vin Diesel differentiate Thanksgiving Turkey from his best friend?

Because they're both roasted

Why can't Harry Potter tell the difference between his cooking pot and his best friend?

Because they're both cauldron

Body Jokes More Body Jokes

What body of water is used for writing?

The Apostrosea.

Why do skeletons not go to the disco?

Because they got no body to dance with!