What would Hellen Keller be doing if she were alive today?

Clawing at the lid of the coffin.

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Today Jokes More Today Jokes

What would Ronald Reagan be doing if he were alive today?

He'd be scratching at the lid of his coffin yelling, "Let me out! I'm alive! Let me out!!"

What does a television have in common with a rabbit?

His ears! Yes, this is a real joke I got from a Laffy Taffy wrapper today, not 30 years ago. I did not laugh.

Claw Jokes More Claw Jokes

What did the cat use to sharpen its claws?

Me. Ow.

What is the difference between cats and commas?

This might be better suited for but I think its more a joke Cats have claws at the ends of it's paws commas haves pauses at the ends of its clause.

Coffin Jokes More Coffin Jokes

What did one sick casket say to the other sick casket?

Is that you, coffin?

Who's there! Coffin! Coffin who?

Coffin and spluttering!

Hellen Keller Jokes More Hellen Keller Jokes

Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away?

You would run away too if your name was MUWWAAAUY

What is Hellen Keller's favorite color?

Corduroy.

Lid Jokes More Lid Jokes

What would Ronald Reagan be doing if he were alive today?

He'd be scratching at the lid of his coffin yelling, "Let me out! I'm alive! Let me out!!"

What would they put on his coffin?

A lid!