Force of Hobbit.
Because the bus hit him.
Drop it in sparkling water.
Bruce Willis. Because old hobbits die hard.
He was afraid they wouldn't be taken on their merits, that they'd just be seen as Tolkien blacks.
Through Frodosynthesis
Because he figured that would be a bad hobbit to get in to.
It has a dark side, a light side, and it holds the universe together.
He was forced to resort to excessive violins.
The Defenestration of Smaug.
