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Why did I rob the bank?

For Fundsies! I made that one up yesterday so I really hope nobody has heard it before.

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Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

What's the difference between CNN and Al-Jazeera?

CNN shows the missiles taking off and Al-Jazeera shows them landing. (Not mine, just heard it on the Jimmy Dore show) also "My favorite indie band is Palestinian. I think they're really going to blow up."

What did the farmer say when he heard the town gossiping about his cornfield fire?

My ears are burning!

Bank Jokes More Bank Jokes

What's the difference between a man who owns a gun and a man who owns a bank?

A man with a gun can rob a bank. A man with a bank can rob the world. (Disclaimer: reword of someone else's post to FB today.)

Which is the only bank that drug tests all of its employees?

PNC

Hope Jokes More Hope Jokes

What do you call a blond with one strand of hair dyed black?

A glimmer of hope

What's the difference between a girl in church and a girl in a bubble bath?

The girl in church has her soul full of hope...

Yesterday Jokes More Yesterday Jokes

What is the chemical formula for water?

Student: "HIJKLMNO." Teacher: "What are you talking about " Student: "Yesterday you said it's H to O!"

Why did I rob the bank?

For Fundsies! I made that one up yesterday so I really hope nobody has heard it before.

Rob Jokes More Rob Jokes

What is a guy who rubs bear toes called?

Rob...wait for it... erto! Rubeartoe!

Why did the black guy loose all his money?

Because a cop robbed him.