He was taking a sheet.
Because you lose every time you talk about him ()
I'd tell you happy birthday, but to me, you've been dead for centuries
Fished but he didn't catch much. He only had two worms!
Because they often spend years at C EDIT: made it more punny
A sheet in the dark!
They get all over the sheets.
He couldn't take a joke.
Someone who takes everything literally
Me: Bed Bath & Beyond Wife: You used a coupon right Me: Coupon *wife faints*