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Why did the lettuce get arrested?

For disturbing the peas!

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Arrest Jokes More Arrest Jokes

Why did the felon have so much energy?

He was well arrested!

What did Abe Lincoln say when he was arrested?

I'm-in-a-cent!

Pea Jokes More Pea Jokes

Why did the orange move to veggieland?

So he could live in peas and hominy.

What's the most polite meal?

Peas and franks.

Lettuce Jokes More Lettuce Jokes

What did Bacon say to Tomato?

Lettuce get together!

What do you get when you give a head of lettuce to an epileptic?

A seizure salad.

Disturb Jokes More Disturb Jokes

What is white and disturbs your lunch?

An avalanche

Why should you never disturb a mirror?

Because they are always reflecting.