Pea Jokes

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Everyone can roast beef, but no one can pea soup.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

What are peas attracted to?

Chickpeas

What do an Iraqi baby, an American president, and a homesick Brit visiting Jerusalem all want?

They all want either pees, peace or peas in the middle east.

What's the most polite meal?

Peas and franks.

Why did the lettuce get arrested?

For disturbing the peas!

Why did the green bean go to jail?

He was disturbing the peas.

What's a hippies favourite food?

Peas, man.

Why did the orange move to veggieland?

So he could live in peas and hominy.

How do you make a blonde's brain the size of a pea?

Inflate it.

What is the big difference between chopped pork and pea soup?

Everybody can chop pork but nobody can pea soup.

What's an idealist vegetarian's favorite meal?

Peas and hominy

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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Pee Soup Jokes More Pee Soup Jokes

What is the difference between roast beef and pee soup?

You can roast beef.

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

Which of these jokes do the pigs like best?

The corniest ones.

What do my jokes have in common with toilet paper?

They're both tearable.

Lunch Jokes More Lunch Jokes

What Bible verse keeps every student going?

Lunch 11:35.

What is white and disturbs your lunch?

An avalanche

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

Why did your sister cut a hole in her new umbrella?

Because she wanted to be able to tell when it stopped raining.

What do Hispanic midgets cut their pizza with?

Little Caesar's

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

What do you get when you push a piano out of the second floor window of an elementary school?

A flat minor.

How many second violinists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They can't get up that high!

Ice Hole Jokes More Ice Hole Jokes

What's the difference between GOP voters and polar bears?

Polar bears gather around the ice hole.

Roast Chicken Jokes More Roast Chicken Jokes

What's the difference between roast chicken and pea soup?

I can roast chicken but I can't pea soup

Why is a sofa like a roast chicken?

Because they're both full of stuffing!

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What do you call the pope after a drive by?

Your holiness

What did the Irishman say about the RC car tied to his scrotum?

It drives me nuts.