What is the difference between a baby and a onion?

No one cries when you chop up the baby.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a man and E.T.?

E.T. phoned home.

What is the difference between a Black Guy and an elevator?

One can raise a child

Cry Jokes More Cry Jokes

What is the difference between a Mother and Wife?

One woman brings you into this world crying and the other ensures you continue to do so.

Why did the apple cry?

Its peelings were hurt.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What sound does a baby make when you put it in a microwave?

I don't know....I was too busy masterbating.

What did the ceiling fan say?

YEEEEAAAAH! GO CEILING! YOU NUMBER ONE BABY! WOOOOOOHOOOOOO!

Onion Jokes More Onion Jokes

Where do you find an old Onion article?

In thier archives.

What's the difference between onions and your mother-in-law?

You don't cry when chopping your mother-in-law.

Chop Jokes More Chop Jokes

What's the difference between a baby and an onion?

I cry when I chop an onion.

What did storm say when she saw wolverine chopping wood?

That's a huge axe man!