Why does the sun never set on the British Empire?

Because God wouldn't trust an Englishman in the dark!

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Trust Jokes More Trust Jokes

Why should you never trust a whale with your secrets?

They're huge blubbermouths.

When I lose faith in humanity, I think of Chili's just handing out sick, light-up beepers, trusting us to return them. And know what?

We do.

Dark Jokes More Dark Jokes

Why the headlight?

Are people vacuuming in the dark or riding them on the freeway & I just havent seen

How many Emos does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They prefer to cry in the dark.

Englishman Jokes More Englishman Jokes

What do Englishmen like more than tea?

Tea tea

Why does the sun never set on the British Empire?

Because God wouldn't trust an Englishman in the dark!

God Jokes More God Jokes

What does God smell like?

Me: 4-year-old: Me: Nachos. 4-year-old: With cheese

What's that machine for?

Oh, that's the forklift" ME: OH MY GOD HOW HEAVY ARE YOUR FORKS

Set Jokes More Set Jokes

What do you call a woman that sets her bills on fire?

Bernadette.

What would you call a set of old school rapper emojis?

Em-OGs

Sun Jokes More Sun Jokes

What's the difference between a tropical beach and a priest?

One gets sun on your skin and the other gets skin on your son.

Whats the difference between Australia and a yoghurt?

Leave a yoghurt out in the sun for 300 years and it'll develop a culture