Why did the Englishman wear a tie to his vasectomy?

Because he wanted to look mptnt

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why does the army want to only recruit married men?

Because they don't want a man lost!

What kind of body do you want to have?

ME: *leans in close* I'd prefer human

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why do the models on the catwalks always look so angry?

I would have been very happy to get paid to just walk around in fancy clothes.

Why was the deaf man sighing and shaking his head in disgust when he looked over at his next door neighbour?

Because she was *airing her dirty laundry*!!!

Englishman Jokes More Englishman Jokes

What do Englishmen like more than tea?

Tea tea

What do you call an Englishman in the World Cup final?

The referee

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

What is it about glow sticks that makes me want to dance in a field wearing fairy wings?

If only I hadn't taken so many drugs I'd know this.

What type of jeans do the Mario Brothers wear?

Denim denim denim

Tie Jokes More Tie Jokes

Did you hear about the two silk worms in a race?

It ended in a tie.

What did Katy Perry steal from Dr. Frankenstein's closet?

The Tie of the Igor.

Vasectomy Jokes More Vasectomy Jokes

What's the difference between a guy with a vasectomy and a guy without a vasectomy?

There's a vas deferens.

What is the distinction between a man that has had a vasectomy and one who hasn't?

I don't know, as far as I'm concerned there's not a vas deferens.