Englishman Jokes

What do Englishmen like more than tea?

Tea tea

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

What do you call an Englishman in the World Cup final?

The referee

Why does the sun never set on the British Empire?

Because God wouldn't trust an Englishman in the dark!

Why did the Englishman wear a tie to his vasectomy?

Because he wanted to look mptnt

You might also enjoy:

Colonel Jokes More Colonel Jokes

Why Colonel had a bunch of underwears?

Because, Brigadier General asked him to debrief his team.

How did colonel Sanders take over the chicken market?

A coup.

Trust Jokes More Trust Jokes

Why can't you trust anything MATTER says?

Because it makes up everything.

How can I trust you again?

H: She meant nothing to me! M: Not that. You bought lite sour cream!

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

How can you tell if an elephant's been to your birthday party?

Look for his footprints in the ice cream.

Why did Princess Leia take so long to find her hair brush?

She kept looking for it in Alderaan places.

Vlad Jokes More Vlad Jokes

Why is everyone afraid of Vladimir Putin?

Because Vlad is Putin everyone in their place.

What do you call an asthmatic vampire?

Vlad The Inhaler.

Dark Jokes More Dark Jokes

How do you find an old man in the dark?

It isn't hard.

Why the headlight?

Are people vacuuming in the dark or riding them on the freeway & I just havent seen

50 Jokes More 50 Jokes

What's not 50% off today?

Health insurance

Why is there only 50 shades of grey?

Why not 5,000 What's stopping them

Slav Jokes More Slav Jokes

Set Jokes More Set Jokes

What did Abraham Lincoln say after recovering from a 3-day drinking binge?

I set* ***who*** *free "*

Why didn't Oscar Pistorius get a new bathroom door?

Because his wife was dead-set against it...