Why does your sister have yeast and shoe Polish for breakfast?

Because she wants to rise and shine.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the 280-pound girl marry the 400-pound man?

She wanted a big wedding.

Why did the hipster complain about winter in July?

He wanted to do it before it was cool.

Rise Jokes More Rise Jokes

What makes a Mexican saddest about the rise of ebooks?

The closing of the Borders.

What did the angry dough ball say to the other dough ball?

You trying to get a rise out of me! Came up with while I was making pizza.

Sister Jokes More Sister Jokes

What did one cell say to his sister after she stepped on him?

Mitosis. Huehuehuehuehuehue

What does Santa say when he meets your wife, your sister and your mother?

HO HO HO, Merry Christmas!

Breakfast Jokes More Breakfast Jokes

What is white and disturbs your breakfast?

An avalanche

What does a thesaurus have for breakfast?

Synonym rolls.

Shine Jokes More Shine Jokes

What do you get if you cross Dracula with Sir Lancelot?

A bite in shining armor.

What's the difference between a Christmas star and a bad pickling job?

One brightly shines...