What happens when the president of the United States has to use the bathroom?

The state of alert in the White House rises to Defecate 2.

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Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens when you put the Energizer bunny's batteries in backwards?

It keeps coming, and coming, and coming...

What is it with people who text and drive?

I swear to god the next time I see this happen, I'll roll down my window and throw my beer at them.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

How did Moses part the Red Sea?

He used a Sea-saw.

What kind of materials do dinosaurs use for the floor of their homes?

Rep Tiles

State Jokes More State Jokes

Which state serves the smallest soft drinks?

Minnesota.

What state makes exclusively swiss cheese?

Swisconsin.

Rise Jokes More Rise Jokes

What do you get if you cross a bike and a rose?

Bicycle petals!

Why does your sister have yeast and shoe polish for breakfast?

Because she wants to rise and shine.

President Jokes More President Jokes

Which president was least guilty?

Lincoln, because he is in a cent.

Which president was famous for his long pauses?

Ellipsis S. Grant.

Bathroom Jokes More Bathroom Jokes

Why did the chicken run around screaming?

Because he had to use the bathroom.

What do you call the surveillance system that watches us all whilst we are in the bathroom?

The panoptijohn

United States Jokes More United States Jokes

How long does a United States Congressman serve?

Until he gets caught.

Who served as the 45th Vice President of the United States?

Warning: Gore

White House Jokes More White House Jokes

Who lives in the white house?

The black man

What's the difference between a pineapple and the White House?

A pineapples pricks are on the outside.

Alert Jokes More Alert Jokes

What body movements alert you that a politician is lying?

His lips are moving.

What happens when the president of the United States has to use the bathroom?

The state of alert in the White House rises to Defecate 2.