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Why would someone in jail want to catch the measles?

So he could break out.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Where will the 400 pound gorilla sleep?

Wherever it wants to. R.I.P. Harambe

How do you want your mother-in-law buried or cremated?

Hmm No risk do both.

Break Jokes More Break Jokes

What happened to the egg and his girlfriend?

They broke up.

What do ya call a bunch of guys breaking into a music store and helping themselves to the stringed instruments?

Luters.

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

What was the name of the operation to catch Juaquin Guzman?

El trapo.

Why did the light turn red?

You would too if you were caught changing in the middle of the street!

Jail Jokes More Jail Jokes

What kind of birds do you usually find locked up?

Jail-birds!

What's the difference between Lindsay Lohan and the newspaper?

Lindsay Lohan never reads the newspaper in jail, but the newspaper always reads "Lindsay Lohan in jail"