Jail Jokes

Why did the tree go to jail?

Treason

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Where do lemons go to jail?

Lemonworth

What would people call Ryan Lochte if he went to jail?

Ryan Locht-up

Why did the staff party go to jail?

Because they were in treble.

Why did the goat stop trying to break out of jail?

Because he was just tired of being an escape goat.

What do prisoners used to talk to each other in jail?

Cell Phones.

Why did the Chemistry Teacher go to Jail?

He got caught giving alcohol to minors.

What's the difference between Rutgers and Rikers?

One turns young people into horrible human beings and the other is jail.

Why did the picture go to jail?

Because it was framed

Why didn't Abraham Lincoln go to jail?

Because he was in-a-cent!

Why Did The Vulcanologist Go To Jail?

Because he, basalt-ed someone. Ba

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How do you get a horse out of jail?

Hay bail.

Why did the clam go to jail?

For setting up illegal shell companies!

Why did the ghost go to jail?

He got arrested for possession.

Why did the 3 year old go to jail?

For resisting a rest.

What did the purple policeman say as he threw the purple man into jail?

INDIGO!

Why did the electron go to jail?

He was charged with battery!

What did the OCD man get thrown in jail for?

Organized crime.

Why did the puppeteer get out of jail?

Because he "pulled a few strings"!

How bacteria stay in contact while they're in jail?

They exchange cell numbers.

Why did the peanut go to jail?

He was a-roasted peanut.

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Why did a pile of gravel go to jail?

Aggregated basalt

What do you call a short physic that has escaped from jail?

A small medium at large

Why did the painting go to jail?

It was framed.

Where do magical animals go to jail?

Azkabarn

What do you call a psychic midget that broke out of jail?

A small medium at large

Where does light go to jail?

Prism

Why was the Energizer Bunny jailed?

On charges of battery.

Why would someone in jail want to catch the measles?

So he could break out.

Why was the paper man sent to jail?

He was caught rustling.

Why did the dragon go to jail for farting?

Arse-on. **Cough Cough** I'll see my way out.

What kind of birds do you usually find locked up?

Jail-birds!

Why couldn't the clock be kept in jail?

Because time was always running out.

What do you call a five foot psychic that escapes from jail?

A small medium at large.

Why did the belt go to jail?

A. Because he held up a pair of pants!

What do you call a midget psychic that broke out of jail?

A small medium at large

Why was the baby put in jail?

For resisting a rest. I'll take my coat

Why did the pigeon get thrown in jail?

For staging a coo

Why did the rope go to jail?

Because he was knotty

What did the salad say as it was thrown into jail?

Lettuce Go!

Why did the green bean go to jail?

He was disturbing the peas.

Why was the belt thrown in jail?

He held up a pair of pants.

Where is a tornado put in jail to be punished?

In a high pressure cell

Why couldn't Diablo get his bros out of jail?

He couldn't pay for Baal

Why do blacksmiths go to jail?

Forging.

Why did the husband go to jail for a crime his wife committed?

Because they finish each other's sentences

Why is a sinking ship like a person in jail?

Because it needs bailing out.

What stars go to jail?

Shooting stars.

Why did the number one go to jail?

187

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What do you get when you have a midget fortune teller on the loose?

A small medium at large.

What do you call a midget fortune teller running from the police?

A small medium at large.

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What do you call a shirt missing its sleeves?

An ampu-tee.

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No shirt, no shoes, no Surface.

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An orderly system for living beyond your means.

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Why do I always seem to start my day backwards?

I wake up tired and I go to bed wide awake

Why did the cheerleader get kicked out on her last day of school?

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Small Medium Jokes More Small Medium Jokes

What do you call a midget psychic that just robbed a bank?

Small medium at large

What do you call it when a psychic midget escape from prison?

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Black Man Jokes More Black Man Jokes

What's long and hard on a black man?

The third grade.

How do you tell if a black mans been on your computer?

It's not there.

Goat Jokes More Goat Jokes

Why did the goat stop trying to break out of jail?

Because he was just tired of being an escape goat.

What do you get when you cross........ the DNA of a human with the DNA of a goat?

Kicked out of the petting zoo.

Newspaper Jokes More Newspaper Jokes

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a newspaper bag?

One is made of plastic and poses a suffocation hazard to small children. The other one contains newspapers.

How did the Reddit user read his newspaper?

LtORIGINAL&gt He Reddit